Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
