she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
Randomize
