these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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