the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
just tell him i said nine months
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
