I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize