Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
