its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Randomize
