That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Randomize
