I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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