Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
