Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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