apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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