she told me i tasted like america
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize