sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
