just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
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