I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Randomize
