gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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