It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
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