ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
