i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
