erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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