I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
