Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
