Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
