I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
