She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
