I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
