are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize