what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Randomize
