Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
