You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize