My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize