she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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