1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
