Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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