I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
