Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize