when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize