The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
