My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize