We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Randomize
