Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize