real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
We left an ass print on the piano.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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