that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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