we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
