How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i barfeds in our rink
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
It's official drugs can't kill me
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
