I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
