Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
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