I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Your cock deserves a montage
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I think I just sharted jello shots
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