He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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