no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
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